Waiting

 We’re into the 9th month of the pandemic restrictions and I’m overcome with the constant waiting.  Waiting for something to happen or maybe just waiting for all this to be over.  Waiting in hiding so as to avoid catching the Covid virus.  Here in the Bay Area, we are strictly following the scientists’ guidelines of social distancing and mask wearing.  Thursday night,  Arne came over for dinner on his way home from Oakland and for the first time, he followed the guidelines completely:  wearing a mask all the while he was inside and when he ate, he went out into a little glassed in porch off our dining room, closed the door except for the smallest crack (so we could talk) and opened the big door to the outside for maximum air flow.  The pandemic is surging everywhere.  For the last week in this country, there have been 180,000 to 199,000 new cases each day with deaths approaching 2000 each day.  And the curve is rising exponentially!  And politically trump still maintains he won the election and is still filing lawsuits and now coercing legislators to go against the voters’ will.  So far nothing has worked.  His followers still believe whatever he says.  He seems bent on destroying our democracy and our country.  And we wait to see what will happen.  I struggle to keep out dire violent images from my imagination.  We don’t know what will happen. This is truly an historic time to be living in.  A time like never before.  The country is divided into two totally different realities.  How can this all end?  I don’t want my life to pass me by without noticing what is happening in it.  The days are pleasant mostly.  Arne brought me some positive books to read, including Obama’s first volume about his presidency so I read.  We will continue to take walks.  I seek out beauty along the way.  We get great pleasure from calls with our kids and friends and siblings.  And as the days pass by, we wait to see what will happen.