Water Rocket Bonanza

The story started some time over the summer when Erik saw a fellow shooting off water rockets in a small park in Cambridge.  An idea was planted in his mind and when he came to Berkeley, he instructed us to begin saving sparkling water bottles.  This Christmas, our grandchildren, his nieces and nephew, got water rocket supplies (empty water bottles, red duct tape, a plastic sheet for fins and a bit white plastic pipe for a snorkel) for Christmas.  I’m not sure they quite understood the plan that Erik had.  But the idea came to fruition on the last afternoon the children were here.  All the children gathered in Bob’s shop to build the rockets.  They put on the fins and taped together two bottles into a rocket and then decorated the bottles with markers and spray paint as Erik and Grandpa worked to make the launching apparatus.  The excitement was building, but it was nip and tuck whether they could finish the building before dark.  I wasn’t sure this was going to work out, but it did.  At 4:30 they began to fire the rockets.  Liam’s rocket was

the first.  He poured the water into the opening of the upside down rocket.  The snorkel pipe was inserted and the bottle turned upside down with the nose cone pointing up and the fin part down.  Then air from Bob’s shop compressor was pumped into the rocket, putting the air in the rocket under pressure while Erik held the rocket in place. When he let it go, the air pushed out the water.  The rocket started to rise slowly, reminding me of the slow start of the big rockets at Cape Canaveral, and then it fell sideways.  Oh no!  They tried again with Sonja’s rocket.  It got placed on the launching pad.  This time, more air was pumped in and the opening was made tighter to keep the water from leaking out.  As Erik released it, it rose high, high into the sky, higher than the house and everyone jumped up and down, so so excited.  The rockets were then fired, one after the other, each one going higher than the one before.  It was a good thing all the rockets but one fell down into the yard and only one got stuck in the tree.  Elsa’s rocket landed in our neighbor’s yard and she was proud she could crawl under the fence to retrieve it.  The children (and adults) were so excited.  The highest rocket flew up at least 75 feet.  The perfect red sunset gave a beautiful backdrop for the rockets flying high into the air. At the end, I heard in my head, “The 1812 Overture” playing dramatically as the rockets were launched faster and faster.  It was like the finale of a fireworks celebration.  Erik gave the children an idea and then showed them how to build and launch these rockets.  The supplies cost next to nothing, but the experience was priceless.  What a fabulous Christmas present!!!

Christmas Wonder

The anticipation has been building all month for the Big Day.  The children have their Advent calendars with little gifts tied on to be opened one each day.  The adults have all the preparations — the Christmas cards to write, the shopping, getting gifts for each person, sending off gifts to friends and family far away, the planning of menus for each day, the laying in of supplies and the preparations of the house.  The children and grandchildren finally arrive.  Christmas Eve and Christmas are the most exciting days.  We have developed quite a few traditions.  We go to the Family Service at church Christmas Eve, then return for a big dinner.  This year, Justin, Arne’s best man, joined us for our spaghetti dinner.  Justin is like an energizer enzyme bringing out animated conversation and laughter in everyone.  The children watch a DVD —this year “Home Alone”—-to pass the time and escape the adults sitting too long at the table before going to bed on the longest night of the year.  Bob and I sneak out to go to the 10 PM Christmas service at church for some Christmas music and candlelight.  Some time in the late night, Santa Claus arrives fills the stockings hung by the fireplace and leaves gifts under the tree.  (S)he eats the cookie and gingerbread house left out for him and writes a sweet note of thanks to the children.  Christmas morning finally arrives.  Another tradition is for Paula, our master chef,  to make fresh cinnamon rolls on Christmas morning.  As we eat our big breakfast, the children grow antsy with anticipation for all presents.  Their excitement and great joy infuse us all with happiness.  There is such a big pile of presents under the tree.  We start slowly, opening the gifts one at a time, all of us watching.  Then it inevitably turns into a frenzy of tearing the paper off.  The adults struggle to maintain a bit of order.  Afterwards, all of us tired from all the excitement wander off to do our own thing: the children play with their new toys, there’s the restorative naps and Paula takes a long long walk or run.  Another tradition is a visit from dear long time family friends, Nancy and Larry.  As the sun sets early, before 5, some of us gather together again, this time in the kitchen as preparation begins for the Christmas dinner.  This is one of my favorite times.  The smell of roast beef cooking makes us all hungry again and reminds me of my childhood.  I love the way people come in to help.  We sit down together to enjoy our delicious dinner of roast beef, popovers, roasted potatoes, peas and horseradish sauce.   We’re all too full for dessert.  At this meal, we say grace and I find it is nice to have a moment to reflect on our Christmas blessings.

The day after Christmas, Erik, Paula and Paul, Karna and kids went into San Francisco, leaving Bob and me a bit of quiet time.  We worked together to create order and then rested in the quiet to restore our depleted energy.  As I sat in quiet, I began to wonder about the meaning of what we all had experienced.  Since my childhood, I have tried to live my life with simplicity and these days aren’t very simple.  I think it’s harder for adults to find simplicity than it is for children.  It was hard to step back and observe with the days so full of excitement and so many people crowded together into our house.  Like Mary, I want to ponder this time in my heart.  I want to remember all the special moments with those I love.  I want to wonder at the mystery of the season.  It is so hard to see clearly and deeply.  I wonder what it is we give each other by our presence?  I wonder what the impact of our words and actions are on each other?  I wonder if our intentions are perceived by others?  I wonder what it means that we celebrate Christmas and what we are teaching our children and grandchildren about what is really important.  Most of all, I want to remember everything and take not a single thing for granted because these are very special times.

Special Gramma times

Some things are so good that putting words around the experience somehow lessens it, but let me try.  I took Erika, my 12 year old granddaughter, to San Francisco to see the musical “Bronx Tale.”  She loves musicals, the dancing and singing and even takes a musical theater class back in E. Lansing.  She was very excited about just the two of us going to see this musical.  I was so excited too.  We took BART into the City and had time to wander the Nordstrom’s mall before getting lunch at a French Bistro.  Strengthened by our meal, we headed off to the Golden Gate Theater where I easily picked up our tickets at will-call.  As the musicians warmed up, we went down to peer into the orchestra pit and to take a closer look at the enormous maroon curtains over the stage.  Our anticipation was growing with each passing minute, so we both read and reread the program, grinned at each other and both thought how lucky we are.  The musical was much better than I expected.  It didn’t get great reviews in San Francisco.  There was lots of wonderful singing and energetic dancing.  I had been told it was a gangster story, but it was much more a coming of age story, about family,  told with song and dance about life in the Bronx in the 60’s.  The final song (Erika’s favorite) was about the choices we make and the dealing with consequences of our choices.  It was a perfect musical and most special treat for a Gramma and a 12 year old granddaughter.  Another special time was making rolled sugar cookies with Sonja.  At 9, she’s quite proficient and meticulous in the kitchen.  I let her take the lead and I was the Sous chef.  She rolled the dough perfectly and decorated the cookies with great patience and creativity.  What a lucky Gramma I am and what happy times I’m enjoying with my family here for the holidays

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Blue Christmas

With Christmas preparations reaching their peak here today (the first family arrives late tonight), besides my abundant joy, I find there is also some sadness in me.  This time of year is very hard for many people: people who are alone, people who are struggling with depression, people struggling with poverty, people from Paradise and other places who are homeless, people who wear injustice like a coat of armor.  Resentments rise up in us.  Some things are really unfair.  This is a time of year when people gather for parties and dinners and with our divided politics, there will be strong differences of opinions.  People are judged and nobody likes to be judged.  We meet those who treat us unfairly. Many people hurt this time of year when everything is supposed to be so good and beautiful.  What to do?  I wrestle with unfairness and darkness in the world.  This morning I’m thinking about how to respond.  In the church we acknowledged these experiences with a “Blue Christmas”  service.  As with most negative experiences, I don’t think it is healthy to ignore and bury them or to focus only on them either.  When we do that these feelings rise up and take over one’s experience in most inconvenient ways.  I think it is good to acknowledge our feelings are real and then to let them go, gently let go of the feelings of hurt and injustice.  Let them flow away from our hearts like logs floating away in a river or like leaves in the wind.  Let go of them.  It is so easy to cling to the hard feelings of injustice because they justify how we feel.  If we are full of hurt or hate or anger, there is little room for love in our hearts.  So many people dwell in darkness, but light really does overcome the darkness.  What can we do?  We meet a stranger’s eyes in the line at the market or post office and smile.  We can look with compassion on the harried shopper or crabby old man.  We can be generous to food banks and organizations that provide help to those in need.  Most of all, bearing our own unfairness or injustice, we can look with compassion at ourselves and let the light of compassion, love, joy flow out of us.  Let us not be dragged down but rise up in the goodness and spirit of this season.

Hog Heaven

I’m just back from a morning happily spent at the UC Botanical Garden.  In November I signed up for a “Conifer Tour” led by Chris Carmichael, the former Director of Horticulture there.  He’s a beloved, gentle and knowledgeable fellow and his tours fill up early.  It was a warm sunny morning, with everything still damp from the heavy weekend rain.  As we stood in a circle around a table overflowing with samples of many different conifers from the Garden, we were serenaded by a single Pacific tree frog and a chorus of cheeping birds, juncoes, titmice and others.  The Garden is very alive especially now our winter rains have begun.  He began by handing us a sheet from “The Gymnosperm Database” summarizing the important facts and listing the families of the various conifers.  He then passed the specimens around as he was describing each—-a celery pine which is neither a pine nor a celery but rather a unique conifer found in the Southernmost countries of the world.  I was excited because I’d seen it in S. Africa, in New Zealand and in Tasmania.  He passed around pines, firs, rimu, spruces, junipers, redwoods, cypresses, cedars and so many more.  My brain got full.  Some people were writing everything down, but I was trying really hard to remember and learn just three things.  After 45 minutes of this lesson, he led us around the Garden stopping occasionally to point out a conifer.  I remember the Japanese Umbrella pine with it’s drooping needles.  At one point, I said to a fellow docent, “I’m in Hog Heaven.”  I just love to go on field trips.  I loved field trips when I was a zoology major in college.  I loved botany field trips in grad school.  I incorporated as many field trips as I could in the many biology classes I taught over the years.  I still get excited and love to go on field trips!  After the tour was over, 5 docents from the tour had arranged to have lunch together.  We found a sunny picnic table and shared our holiday treats.  It is so much fun to be with kindred spirits who love the same things I do.  Botany nerds who get excited over a big female cone dehiscing on a cycad and all manner of conifers.   It was a wonderful morning respite from all the holiday preparations.

A Christmas Prayer

Over the past twenty-five years, since the boys left home, Bob and I have come to a peaceful agreement about how we dothe Christmas tree.  We go together in the truck to Home Depot (Bob’s favorite store) where we choose without much difficulty a noble fir tree.  We bring it home and Bob prepares it to go into the Christmas tree stand.  That task usually involves cutting off some branches and sawing off the bottom of the trunk with his chain saw. This year Bob made a block with a hole in it to fit into the deep holder we have because I didn’t want any branches cut off the rather small compact tree we chose.  Then tree is brought into the house, placed in the stand and Bob goes off to his workshop, his part done.  Now my work begins, I’m left to decorate it by myself.  I’ve come to enjoy this quiet time: it’s an act of remembering all family’s our many Christmases together and a time of creativity.  For the past three years I’ve decorated the tree with a theme using homemade decorations.  But this  year I went back to the treasure trove of ornaments we have from many Christmases together.   First, I put the star on the top and looped tiny white lights all over the tree. Then I laid all the decorations out.  First, I noticed a box labeled stars and thought, “yes, Christmas is about light.”  It comes right after the winter solstice, so the days are beginning to get longer.  It’s also about the light because the Christ child is coming into the world.   If Christmas is to be more than tradition, it has to come to us.  We bring light into the world with intentional acts of kindness and generosity.  I see light in joyful faces as we gather together.  Let the stars bring light to my Christmas.   Then I found a box with angels in it.  Angels are close this time of year.  Maybe it is angels that inspire us to be generous and have a spirit of love toward our fellow beings..  I put all the angels on the little tree.  My task got harder then because the rest of the ornaments were not sorted by kind, but I was on a roll.  So I picked out the ornaments that were babies or children.  Christmas is about children, their joy.  One ornament is a tiny baby in a half a walnut shell  I remember buying when I was expecting our first born.  I found nature ornaments including many birds.  For me, birds are like Spirit, often hidden in the branches, but there and calling to us.  Birds are beautiful and free and infinitely varied in their kind.  I put many birds on the tree, red cardinals, even though there aren’t any cardinals in California, a cedar wax-wing, a feathered owl, a blue bird (I saw one the other day out the window at the gym).  Last but not least, I put on all the many hearts I had.  In Denmark, they put hearts all over the Christmas tree, hearts made of woven paper, made of straw and of wood.  For me, hearts symbolize love and love is what Christmas is all about—God’s love for us, our love for family and friends and maybe even for our all our fellow humans here on Earth with us.  There is a gentle sense of love that comes over us in the quiet moments of this season like I was experiencing decorating the tree.  Finally I put Scandinavian flags festooned all over the tree all from our time in Denmark.  It’s a tradition for us.  Tradition is important too.  We keep alive in our hearts Christmases past. The tree wasn’t done, it needed one more thing:  candy canes, sweet and pepperminty hung tall over the tree because Christmas is the sweetest time of year.  I looked at that tree and was pleased.  When I thought about this time I recognized it was all a prayer, a prayer for Chrismas.  I realize I want light, angels, love, Nature, family and friends and sweetness in my life.  Let Christmas come.  The Tree is ready.

Unexpected Gift

Last night I received an amazing unexpected gift when Nancy and Larry came to dinner.  Nancy handed me a white plastic bag and said “This is for you.  It’s not for Christmas or your birthday or any particular reason.”  I took it and pulled out the most spectacular handmade quilt I’d ever seen.  I don’t think I’m particularly good at receiving gifts so there was no way I could express with just smiles and words how deeply affected I am by this gift.  I know she likes to make quilts and she’s gotten really good at it over the years.  But to receive one?  Wow!  It is bounded on the sides by fabric I’d given her years ago - blues, aquas and greens with a splash of purple arranged into clouds that float and swirl like a tropical sky about to rain.  The center is made of 20 largish squares, each made up of 21 smaller pieces - a center square of winter trees, surrounded by squares of blue set on end, then all this is set in pale green arranged in a square.  It’s machine quilted in free moving looping swirling circles accentuating the clouds motif.  Nancy said the theme of the quilt came to her as she was piecing it together - Promise.  I find myself sitting in my chair with the quilt folded over my legs pondering the gift and its theme.  At my age, what does Promise mean?  I love to think about a long fruitful friendship that still has much promise.  I don’t want to get up and take it off.  It’s so warming, not just physically, but spiritually as well.  I feel wrapped in love.  Larry said to us, “It’s the best  one she’s made.”  All in all, I am still smiling and will be for a long time.  What a wonderful gift!  What a friend!

gift!  What a friend!!

Holiday Preparations

We arrived back in Berkeley from Detroit at the beginning of the week.  It took me several days to pull myself all back together and become functional again.  It’s like a part of me was left behind.  I don’t know if it’s fatigue from traveling or if my focus and attention take their time gathering again.  When I looked at all I had to do in the next couple of weeks, I was totally overwhelmed.  As the windows on the Advent calendar on the frig were opened as the days passed and there were more and more windows open, I became even more paralyzed.  Bob wasn’t disturbed and he worked diligently to complete the Christmas letter and a project we are giving our children for Christmas.  Bless his heart.  All the while I sat paralyzed by the tasks.  I found a pile of old Christmas cards I’d saved and put one that spoke to me on the windowsill in the kitchen.  It’s a simple blessing saying “May there be joys each day.”  Seeing it each morning, I began looking for the joys in my days and you know what, I found multitudes of joys.  Yesterday, the staff at the Botanical Garden gave a beautiful catered luncheon for all the Volunteers.  There was festive eggnog first, as we gathered.  I enjoyed seeing so many fellow volunteers I now know.  We all share a strong bond of loving the Garden and it was a pleasure to be in the wonderful company of volunteers.  We enjoyed delicious gourmet food.  We were given little presents thanking us for our service.  All in all, it is a great pleasure for me to volunteer in the Garden and how nice to be appreciated.  Before the Luncheon I did errands and completed everything on my list with no hassle.  Today I went out early to do more Christmas shopping.  There was no traffic.  The stores I went to were deserted  and everything I bought was substantially discounted.  Joy!  By looking for joys, I find them.  Maybe this really is a Season of Joy, if I can just keep my mind focused on the positive, I’ll find them.   I have so much to be grateful for and so much to give me joy.  How truly blessed I am!!!

Greenfield Village Christmas

Paula booked tickets for us all to go to the Greenfield VillageHoliday Nights at the Henry Ford Museum in Dearborn Michigan last Friday night.  She also rented a mini-van so we could all be together for the 2 hour each way ride.  It was an unapologetic extravaganza celebrating Christmas!  All the historic houses were decorated for Christmas, as it was in the time the house was built.  They were staffed by costumed actors who all had stories to tell.  I found the chocolatiers really interesting.  Since Christmas wasn't really celebrated in New England in the 18 century, the houses were actually decorated for New Years' Open Houses.  There were carolers  on the streets singing Christmas carols.  There was a brass band by the shops playing Christmas carols.  The streets and shops were decorated with copious greens and lights.  There were warming fires placed all around this big village so no one had to stay cold.  We felt we lucked out for the weather, it wasn't raining or snowing and the temperature hovered around 32.  When one is dressed for the weather, as we were, it is really pleasant walking around.  There were drummers and fife players, even a pair of chimney sweeps and of course there was a most jolly Santa Claus.  There was an ice skating rink for anyone who wanted to skate and a craft cottage so those who wanted could make crafts.  It was so much fun!!  I found it mysterious to walk around in the dark, hearing music, seeing the lights, smelling the smoke from all the fires.  It made us all feel transported back in time.  But best of all was the finale:  we gathered by the Town Hall, where there was a parade of actors marching up to Village Green, the Brass Band playing Christmas carols and of course, Santa arriving in a Model T Ford.  Then the announcer told us to all call out to Rudolph to light up the skies and the fireworks began.  I haven't enjoyed a display so much for many years.  In the background, the band played carols, the carolers led singing as we all joined in.  It felt so good to be with others in a public place singing Christmas carols.  I do love the Midwest!!!  The evening was beautiful, fun, interesting and a great celebration of the joys of the Christmas season.  Many thanks to our wonderful daughter-in-law for arranging the evening!

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A Walk in the Snowy Woods

Michigan delights me in so many ways.  Today we met friends at the Blue Gill Grill near L. Lansing in Haslett, a town East of here.  We spied our friends at a high table by the window.  "If you want," Connie told me, "you can gamble in here."  Bob loved the menu, especially the $4.50 for a pint of draft IPA.  We enjoyed lively conversation over our delicious food.  Since the weather was so cold and snowy, consuming Calories seemed the sensible thing to do.  After lunch, we prepared ourselves, putting on our outdoor gear (long underwear, snow pants, scarves, hats and mittens).  Then, we put on the bright orange hats and bibs our friends brought along -- it's hunting season here.  We drove to a nearby woodsy park and decided the ice under the snow wasn't so bad, so we set out for our stroll in the snow covered woods.  The Robert Frost poem, "Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening", kept running through my head, at least the first few lines.  It was so incredibly beautiful and so still.  The large fluffy snowflakes coming down as we first began, the silent sleeping trunks of the tall oak and pine trees and the pristine snow on the forest floor were painted in gray, black, brown and white.  The ladies paired up and walked on ahead, our bright colors and loud voices disturbing the quiet as we walked along.  We paused and considered where the path split.  It took more than a little time to decide which way to go.  Jim used his IPhone to determine the compass points.  We all studied the map.  Finally we went the way of the green arrow on a sign post.  We chose the path we wanted and it looped around taking us back to our car.  The stillness of the woods on this snowy afternoon impressed me and I hope will stay with me for a good while.

A Snow Day!

When I woke up yesterday morning, the bluish color of the light was the first thing I noticed.  Something was different.  I peeked out through the blinds and behold, the world was covered in a thick layer of undisturbed white snow creating a magical whole new world to behold.  It had snowed 4 or 5 inches overnight and was predicted to snow most of the day.  At 5 AM, it was officially declared a SNOW DAY by the E. Lansing schools!  It was a bonus, like a free pass in Monopoly with the potential for fun, relaxation and special activities.  A Snow Day is a day made for kids.  I never had one growing up in S. California so I especially share the joy with my grandchildren.  I still remember the one morning of my childhood when it had snowed a couple of inches and my mother made me go to school.  I think I still haven't forgiven her.  This morning, Paul texted me to come over around 8, the parents had no snow day and had to go to work.  The girls were still asleep.     After a 10 AM breakfast of waffles and bacon, the girls lobbied to go sledding.  I was given the task wrapping up the presents for their Advent calendars.  Erika told me, "it's a good day for us to tie them on.  We like to admire the presents and try to figure out what's in each package beforehand."  Each year it's a tradition that I send them a small present for each day of Advent.  I collect little things all year long for this.  So Bob got the task to walk with the girls to Mickey Mouse hill behind MacDonald Middle School.  The girls had a ball, sledding down the hill and running up just to go down again, at least 20 times, Bob estimated.  Sonja told me that no matter where she was, in front or in back, she was the one who seemed to always get her face full of snow.  I love their passion and total abandonment to this special Snow Day activity. I was surprised to hear the sledding hill wasn't packed with kids.  I had imagined the scene like a Norman Rockwell painting, crowded with families and kids.  Maybe not that many had grandparents to take them!  After an hour there, they all walked the .8 mile back home.  I had the requisite steaming hot tomato soup, grilled cheese sandwiches and hot cocoa awaiting them at home.  In the mellowness that followed, we played games, the girls tied their Advent presents on their calendars and then we all read together before Erika found her way to the computer for a few games.  I cooked dinner and we waited for the parents to come home so we could decorate the Christmas tree.  It was a great day, a sweet treat, filled with special activities, special food and quality time spent together.  Hooray for Snow Days!!

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Making Memories

Maybe it's all about making memories.  Today was a day for that.  After a delicious brunch with friends of Paul and Paula, we all went out to the Peacock Road Family Farm, 20 minutes away, to cut this year's Christmas Tree.  The drive took us out into the countryside, twisting and turning past fields and farms, until we ended on Peacock Road, a wet dirt road.  Turning into the farm, we saw that we weren't the only people who had this idea.  The big parking lot was full!  Not to worry, the Farm was very well organized to handle the crowds.  As one fellow said to me, "Of course, it's crowded, it's a Sunday and 40 degrees.  It won't be this warm again before Christmas."  We got into a big wagon pulled by a tractor and rode out into their fields of Christmas trees.  The trees of all different sizes were tagged, $10 a foot, so a 6 foot tree was $60.  The tractor came to a stop and we got off, picked up a saw and began the search.  The girls ran ahead, excited to choose their tree.  They were very discriminating carefully considering the advantages and disadvantages of each tree.  We walked through the fields of neatly trimmed fir trees following the sound of the girls' excited voices.  Finally, near the farthest limit of the field they selected a tree.  It took much discussion to be sure this particular tree was the right one.  During the long discussion, I became intrigued by the beauty of milkweed seed pods exploding silky seeds with pure white parachutes.  I decorated a tree with the silky bits as if they were Christmas ornaments.  We all watched in awe as Paula got on her knees and began sawing at the base of the chosen tree.  We all cheered when the final cut was made!  Paul, then, picked up the tree and carried it back to the drop off station where there was a roaring fire with white plastic lawn chairs around it, inviting us to warm up as we waited for the next tractor.  Back at the headquarters, our tree was prepared for us to take home (shaken to remove the dead needles, the end sawed off, and put into netting).  We wandered off following the girls to the various activities on the farm.  We visited the "Sugar Shack" where we could buy iced sugar cookies to decorate with green and red colored sugar and freshly made donuts.  We found a shed full of seed corn for the kids to play in (rather like styrofoam, but natural); a wagon with a high platform to jump off into huge piles of hay; and a maze.  There was also a gift shop we managed to avoid.  The farm was well done and visitor friendly.  I thought about how the whole experience and what a very special activity it is.  Our granddaughters are most fortunate to have this as a tradition.  It will be a treasured memory, more so as the years go by.  It was our great pleasure to experience it with them this year.

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Christmas decorations

It's a big weekend for celebrating! Yesterday was Thanksgiving and we have much for which we are grateful.  We enjoyed the day very much.  First, the Turkey Trot, then helping Paula prepare a sumptuous feast.  It was fun to watch Erika chopping the vegetables, so interested in learning her mother's cooking skills.  I got off easy, my job was to make the mashed potatoes.  Paula cooked the gourmet brined turkey, made homemade cranberry sauce, made gourmet stuffing with bacon, crumbled chestnuts and dried prunes and made Brussel sprouts so delicious I had two helpings of them.  Paul made a loaf of homemade bread and prepared the orange glazed carrots.  Paula made a pumpkin and an apple pie the night before.  We shared the meal with family friends and eleven of us gathered around the tables in the living room.  Afterward  enjoying the natural mellowing from the ample delicious food, we sat in the afterglow and enjoyed good conversations while the children played happily together.

Today, the season shifted as the turkey came off the front door.  Paula pulled out all the stops and has not only decorated her house with wreaths and lights and a Rudolf reindeer, a snowy penguin and colorfully wrapped packages the light up, but she also decorated our house with colored lights hanging from the eves and a sparkling angel and snowman.  I love Paula's joyful energy and enthusiasm that is carrying all of us along into the joy of Advent.  

Though the problems of the world are still there, looking at the sparkling lights, I remember our many blessings: family, good health, peace, and abundance and as little Tim said last night after the grace was said, "don't forget art and music!"  And I might add, don't forget the joy!!  This season, the sparkling lights will remind me to be grateful.

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The Turkey Trot

It was a gray, cloudy, overcast morning.  The thermometer registered 19 F as we left the house this morning to go to downtown Lansing to participate in the Lansing 5K Turkey Trot.  It's the coldest Thanksgiving here in 100 years.  It's a family tradition to do the Turkey Trot, but I wasn't at all sure this was for me.  But Paula had entered us all and had turkey headbands for us, so being good sports we went along.  Bob and I dressed like we were going on an Arctic expedition.  I looked like the Michelin man.  All 6 of us squeezed into our car and drove the 3 or 4 miles to the start of the race.  It was a crowded scene with about 4700 participants.  Runners and walkers of all sizes and shapes, many dressed in costumes  (turkey hats were very popular) crowded up to the starting gate.  There were families pushing strollers and lots of dogs all with warm coats on.  Everyone surged through the starting gate with a silent mighty roar just at 9 AM.  Paula and Sonja were up in the front with the runners.  I walked with Erika and she made sure we walked fast enough so no one passed us.  Sonja won a medal (3rd in her age group out of 167 at 24 minutes!!).  I came in 4th in my age group (female 75-79) just missing a medal at 54 minutes for the 5K.  Bob and Paul fell back behind us as Bob couldn't pass up taking photos of the Capitol, of Sonja running by, and of the crowd.  How cold was it?  It was so cold that when I ate a piece of chocolate along the way, it wouldn't melt in my mouth.  But I didn't feel the cold and was thrilled to have participated and enjoyed the whole experience.   Next year I'll train and push a little harder for a medal!!

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A Day in E. Lansing

I've had barely more than 12 hours shared with the granddaughters and we've already had so many adventures.  When they came home from school, they had after-school snacks (an ice cream bar for one, dried seaweed for the other) and then they showed me what they're up to.  The older one got on the computer and showed me movie trailers.  We're going to see the new Harry Potter movie this weekend if we can.  The younger one taught me a new card game (Slap Jack) with a deck of cards she won running fast at her Running Club.  We had pizza for an early dinner and then went to the local elementary school for the 5th grade fund raiser.  The movie night featured Paddington Bear for the younger kids and The Incredibles 2 for the older kids.  It was kid heaven: being in your pjs, having blankets and stuffed animals on the gym floor, lying around with your friends and stuffed animals on the gym floor eating popcorn and candy while watching the movie.  I sat in the back (on a chair) and loved seeing the kids' reactions to what happened in the movie.  They all loved the baby, Jack-Jack, and his superpowers the best.  The room erupted in giggles and loud laughter when he was in a scene.  Afterwards we came home and Sonja and I played every game we could think of until it was bedtime.  She won 2 games of Slap Jack and I won 4 straight games of Connect Four!  It's fun to play with her.  This morning I made Belgian waffles and scrambled eggs using the eggs laid yesterday by Sonja's chickens.  Now I am waiting to take Sonja to the gym for her tennis lesson.  Life is never dull, here in E. Lansing!

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From Smoke to Snow

We left the smoky Bay Area behind us yesterday morning early as we travelled to Michigan where it was snowing when we arrived.  From smoke to snow was quite a transition.  The air quality in Berkeley has been so bad from the fires up North that we have been advised to stay indoors all week.  There's been a ridge of high pressure over California and it has acted like a lid over us trapping smoke which has built up getting more unhealthy by the day.  Everyone I spoke with was suffering from the bad air and yet felt so bad for the losses the people in Paradise have suffered.  Officials say more than 8,800 structures have burned and 56 people confirmed dead with hundreds still missing.  So many of the people burned out were just making it financially, had no fire insurance and now have nothing.  With winter coming on and rain predicted next week, the situation for them will get worse.  So far, the news says there's been no government help for these victims.  Meanwhile, we left it all far behind and arrived here to be most warmly greeted by our family.  The house had fresh flowers in it and it is stocked with enough gourmet food to last a week.  Walking outside last night, I looked up and saw big fluffy white snowflakes coming down, falling slowly like little kites, like they do, and the song "My Favorite Things" from The Sound of Music flooded into my mind.  Indeed, it is one of my favorite things to be here.  This morning as I took photos, I heard the chickens, clucking away in the snow, able to cope with the cold weather here.  If they can, so can I!  I look forward to unfolding adventures in our two weeks back here in Michigan.

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Music Heals

There's a Chamber Music Series at the Crowden School.  Arne went to the Crowden School more than 20 years ago when the school was newly founded.  Now, it is the premier music focused school for middle schoolers on the West Coast.  It warms my heart to go to concerts there.   SFSymphony members play in this Concert Series so the music is really at a high level.  Even though it was a modern program - two pieces by a composer born in 1986 I'd never heard of, I wanted to go.  The concert was a surprise and delight!  The young composer, Matthew Arnerich from Santa Rosa, was there in person and introduced his pieces.  The first, Sonata for Cello and Piano, he called a Meditation on Death.  It was written for his friend, a cellist, who lost his son in a car accident.  The piece was hauntingly achingly beautiful as it expressed all the emotions of grieving.  "Music heals," said the composer and he is right.  Surrounded by his amazing music, I began to feel better.  It was two hours of extraordinary music!  When we came out after, I saw a crescent moon in the sky.  The news says tomorrow will be another very smoky day with unhealthy air, but for tonight, I feel better soothed and inspired by the wonderful healing music.

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Bad News

Bad news.  My beautiful state is burning up and there was yet another mass shooting, killing mostly young college age people this week.  What is happening?  Guns and climate change and the effects of population pressure are some reasons.  While fire is natural in Mediterranean ecosystems, they are worse now because we've prevented them for a hundred years allowing the fuel to build up.  The Camp Fire up northeast of us burned up the town of Paradise.  Bob has several friends who lived there.  They escaped through flames with their lives, though their houses did not likely survive.  The fire fueled by tinder dry forests and fanned by Santa Ana winds raced at a speed (reported in the NYTimes) of up to 80 acres/minute.  Experts say increasingly people are living closer and closer to forests and that's one cause of the damage to so many human structures.  Here, for three days the air has been unbelievably bad.  We can hardly see the nearby trees out our windows.  We are told to stay indoors.  Children at school aren't allowed to go outside for recess or lunch, tours at the Botanical Garden and water aerobics at the gym have been cancelled due to bad air quality.  Small price for us to pay.  We recognize, however, it could be us fleeing flames.  Living close to Tilden Park's trees, we too are vulnerable should a fire start near here.  Berkeley has burned before.  And another mass shooting?  On the news I heard that there have been 307 mass shootings in the US just this year.  They are so common, we don't hear about them all any more  We cannot grow numb to them.  Increasingly the shootings are in the places we all go: churches, stores, bars and of course schools.  I fear it will only grow worse.  In biology class, we used to teach about the stress of over-population on animal populations.  Are we so different?

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Carpe Diem

This morning Bob waxed poetic telling me how good life is.  "You know, it's another beautiful day (a sunny 70 degree day), we had a great breakfast (bacon and eggs and homemade blueberry scones) and our health is good, our family is fine.  Life is good."  "But" he continued, "we're living right on top of the Hayward fault and it could let go anytime; at our ages, our health could change fast."  He's right, it is a beautiful Sunday morning, we are so fortunate, there's nothing we have to do but take care of ourselves.  In this intensely political time, we do spend a lot of time worrying about our country and the up-coming election.  I have a bad feeling about this one, like I did before the last one.  I hope I'm wrong.  We've already voted on our absentee ballots, so there's nothing to do but wait.  Wait and enjoy the day.

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Massacre in Pittsburgh

I'm am tremendously saddened even heart-broken by the murder of 11 Jewish congregants at worship in the Tree of Life Temple in Pittsburg.  It makes very sad that my Jewish friends no longer feel safe.  The rapid increase of hate crimes, the worst being Saturday's horrible attack, since Trump took office is totally unacceptable.  When a leader hates, mocks or ridicules, those who follow the leader are given permission to also hate and then some will move their hate into action.  We have laws against hate speech and hate crimes.  It isn't enforced on social media where hate speech amplifies and multiplies under the banner of free speech.  In our politically polarized climate where Trump rejects the norms of American culture and lies repeatedly blaming victims, blaming others for his and his party's failures, inciting fears (hatred's fuel) and even stirring up hatred, we must not be reactive, responding in kind, but stand up and say no.  Each of us must consciously step up and counter hate wherever and whenever we see it, no matter how small or how large.  Emotions (fear, hate, love) are contagious, I think.  Hate is contagious and there is an epidemic of it in our country and in the world, stirred up by Trump and other political leaders in our country and beyond.

I recall an experiment I did years ago when I was a teacher.  It was the beginning of the school year in September and a couple of girls were really mad they had been assigned to my class instead of the other teacher's class.  Each day they came into class and I felt the darkness of hate increase in the classroom as they glowered at me.  I saw that I had three choices in how to respond to their hatred.  I could hate them back, I could remain neutral or I could consciously love them.  It was tempting to just be neutral and try to ignore their hatred, but I thought that way they would win, their hatred would still fill the classroom.   I'd been taught at church that love was more powerful than hate and here was a place to test that.  So hard as it was, each day whenever I'd see them in class or around the campus, I'd think loving affirmative thoughts about them. - I'd look at them with compassion.  Surprisingly, at least to me, within a week, their hate was gone, replaced with love.  I'd become their favorite teacher.  To be sure this is a very very small example compared with what is going on now, but I think it shows what we must try to do.  We must stand up to hate actively, not accepting the evil that was done, but not hate the evil-doers.  It only lowers us to their levels, making us haters too and filling the world with ever more hatred.  It is evil in the current dark and uncertain time with so many challenges to stoke up fears and hatred.  We must resist with all that is in us.  We must say NO to fear and hatred.  We must stand in solidarity with the victims of hate.  Hard as it is, spiritually we must bring the light of compassion into the world and not more hatred and fear.

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Autumn days

It's a wonderful, warm, late October day, the light is different, softer, coming more on an angle.  The days are growing shorter more quickly each passing day.  It's darker in the morning when I get up.  Here in beautiful Northern California, the earth is waiting for the rains that usually come next month.  Plants are hanging on, surviving, waiting it out until the soil is wet once again.  The brown hills will quickly turn green as the seeds spread last Spring sprout in the moist soil.  The beauty here sometimes takes my breath away, like the other morning when I noticed in the dark blue morning sky at 7 AM, a full moon setting over Mt. Tamalpais just across the Bay to the West.  Then looking South-East I saw in the sunrise pink and gold clouds streaking across a pale pink and powder blue sky.  I thought, it doesn't get more beautiful than this.  It is a time for waiting, for resting, for being fully present to these amazing late October days.

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The Great Put Back

To get ready for the rat team we had to clear out 90% of the stuff in our storage area ( see previous blog 10/2/18).  Some of it is now in a landfill near Livermore, some is at Urban Ore, and the rest had to go somewhere temporarily, as you see in first photo. The second two photos show the storage area now (before the great “put back,”) and as it once looked decades ago when the concrete floor was poured.  No more cardboard!  Everything that passed the test of relevance is back in plastic bins, duly labeled and placed back in a cluster of similarly labelled bins.  The most wonderful thing that has happened from the "Great Put Back" is the inspiration Bob has taken to organize disparate places in our house - the garage cupboards, the shelves in the storage area, his workshop.  We've made progress, mostly in the name of our children (so they won't have to go through so much stuff) and it feels really good to have order where chaos formerly prevailed.  Maybe the rats were a gift in disguise, forcing us to do what needed to be done.

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The High School Reunion

Last Thursday Bob and I flew across the country to attend his 60th High School Reunion in Pearl River, NY.  It seemed like a long way to go for such a short time, but it was very important to Bob.  The Reunion committee had worked hard and had a number of activities planned over the 3-day weekend.  We met outside the HIgh School at 11 AM Friday for the first activity which was a meeting with students of an 8th grade history class.  They were studying the "50's (hard to imagine that our lives are now history).  The day before, the very enthusiastic teacher had gotten the students to write down questions to ask the oldsters.  He divided up his students to sit at different tables where 2 or 3 graduates of the class of 1958 could sit.  The kids then asked questions from the sheet of their compiled questions.  Some example questions are: What kinds of sports were available to girls, What kind of technology was used in school, What was the cost of pizza, movies, gas?  We met next at 3 PM by the plaque under the tree the class planted 5 years ago to honor classmates who had died.  I led a brief memorial time that was enhanced by memories shared about the classmates who have died.  Approximately a few more than third of the class have died, a third attended the reunion and a third did not for a variety of reasons.  After that, we went to the Elk's Club for conversation and drinks.  The next morning's activity was a walk around the historic part of town.  Bob said that time was really fun with lots of conversation and laughter.  The best part for me was the dinner Saturday night at the Conference Center where we were all staying.  Though the food left something to be desired, the energy and happiness of those attending were very high.  The evening was full of silly remembrances like a cameo appearance of the BopTones - the band that Bob was in with all the guys wearing a new special edition Tee shirt of the BopTones.  There was a Trivia Contest with the tables competing with each other.  The Reunion Committee had made a series of questions we all tried to answer.  There was a sheet of specific questions about Pearl River; about 50's Culture and about 50's Music.  While some questions were easy (What was the first Russian satellite named?), most were harder (Who were Ricky and Lucy's neighbors in the I Love Lucy tv show;  what was actor William Boyd's film name).  The last sheet on music was the hardest for me (What was The Penguins #1 hit song; what Christmas song was popularized by Gene Autry; In the Everly Brothers hit song "Wake Up Little Susie" what time did Susie wake up?)  We all participated, laughing as we tried to remember specifics from so very long ago.  It was bittersweet to say goodbye knowing as we do at our age that nothing is guaranteed and we don't know who we'll see again in 5 years at the 65th Reunion.

Although my memories of my high school years aren't nearly as positive as Bob's, I realized at this reunion, the tremendous overlap all high school students in the 50's share.  Our culture, our music, our very way of being as white middle-class high school students was very very similar no matter where we lived.  It was a good time to grow up.  The world and our prospects were bright and hopeful.  We could all look forward to finding a job of our choice, to buying a house, knowing it was easier for us than for our parents.   I also saw at this reunion that "our time" has passed, a long time ago, when we retired our jobs and became the old ones.  Now we're the very much older ones and you know, it's ok.  I feel again incredibly grateful for the life I've had, for all the opportunities and experiences that I've shared with those of my cohort.  It has been  a very good ride indeed.

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Apple Tart

In these hard times where our country, families and friends are bitterly divided into what the media calls tribes, with political views bitterly and diametrically opposed, I feel beat up, abandoned, distressed and depressed over what is and what may come.  I worry for my granddaughters' future.  It is good to find something beautiful that everyone can appreciate.  I made an apple tart last night using the Wickson apples from Arne's apple tree.  They were grafted on to his prize apple tree 3 or 4 years ago.  These tiny perfect little apples are  only a 1 or 2 inches across.  They are bright red jewels, gifts from the tree.  The tart was delicious and as I remember it, I try to gather hope that we in our country can find ways to talk to each other and recover our common humanity.  It's going to have to start with us because we have no leaders in any branch of government who hasn't been tainted  by Trump.  I see no one who can lead us into acting out of the better angels of our human nature.

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Heartless Mocking

Tonight, I am totally appalled by Trump's rantings last night's rally in Mississippi mocking Dr. Blaksley Ford's testimony before the Senate Judiciary Committee.  It was mean spirited, cruel, and heartless.  To mock her testimony makes every woman and man who has been sexually abused feel even more threatened and vulnerable.  If the President can make fun of her very believable testimony of abuse, why would any victim of abuse ever feel safe to come forward.  I commend the courage of those who have spoken out but I believe most victims now feel the need to protect themselves and keep quiet.  Until we create a climate of safety, this scourge of sexual abuse will continue and the majority victims will remain silent.  Shame on President Trump!

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Cleaning Out

We have been faced with a serious rat infestation in our storage area.  For nearly 40 years we've put things there.  It held the detritus of our lives and the history too.  Box upon box, big plastic bin stacked upon big plastic bin.  Bob's mother's sewing machine from 1938, the bed frame of the boys bunk bed and so much more.  Books that could find no home in an upstairs shelf.  Then the reality of the rats hit us.  Everything had to be taken out, sorted through.  There are years and years of tax records and I've been carefully going through the mildewed returns separating pages that have our social security numbers on them (to be shredded).  Sorting through boxes left by our children (college detritus for example), treasures from Bob's parents' house (nearly 25 years ago) and things too good to throw out or things Bob thought he might use again.  It's a huge smelly job.  It overwhelmed us both.  But now more than half-way through, after numerous trips to the dump, I am surprisingly beginning to feel enormous sense of gratitude for the many years of our life together, for the wonderful life we've had.  It quite a profound turn around to see the richness and goodness stored away.  Everything hasn't been thrown out, precious letters, family history and much else has been carefully put into new or washed out plastic bins.  Now we know what's there and maybe I'll even catalog the bins.

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Fire and Ice

Friday night late we got back from an 11 day trip to Iceland and Greenland.  I like islands and Bob likes cold polar regions so it was a good match for us to resume our adventure travel.  We joined a Lindblad/National Geographic tour so it wasn't really so adventurous and very comfortable and well done.  Iceland is a land of fire.  There are 30 active volcano fields and an earthquake almost every day somewhere.  We saw fumaroles, bubbling mud pots, geysers, steam vents, hot water spas and lots of lava fields covered with moss.  The only thing that's cheap in Iceland is electricity.  70% of the electricity is geothermal.  It was interesting to see pipes running along the ground by the roads carrying the hot water to and from the power plants.  The rest comes from hydroelectric.  There are also lots of big and very beautiful rivers and waterfalls with the water from the melting glaciers as well as the ample rainfall.  The South Coast of Iceland reminded us so much of the West Coast of the South Island of New Zealand, Bob kept referring to our trip as one to New Zealand.  There are only 360,000 people in Iceland, with 2/3 of them in Reykjavik, the capital.   We went of several walking tours of the city.  The Hallgrims Church is a landmark as it is visible from everywhere.  It's a Lutheran parish church, but is very large and has distinctive architecture reminiscent of the pentagonal columnar rock formation on the South Coast.  The other outstanding building is the Harpa, the opera house designed by Olafur Eliasson.  It blew Bob away with it's endless glass geometric shapes and designs.  It was a joy to photograph!  But it was the nature that I loved in Iceland  My favorite activity was a 3 mile hike to a hot thermal creek off in the hills not far from Reykjavik.  It was good to hike in the countryside and then soak in the hot water of the creek.  Far and away the best part of our trip was the visit to Greenland.  We flew in a chartered jet to a huge airfield, built by the U.S. In the Cold War, got on a bus, rode 1/2 hour to a dock and took a zodiac to our ship the National Geographic Explorer.  What a pleasure to be on this well appointed, most comfortable ship with a very professional staff there just to take care of us.  The first night we had a marvelous display of the Northern lights.  They were so bright, even  IPhone photos worked.  Greenland has only 55,000 residents and very few towns and we visited two of them.  There is no infrastructure so the only way to get from place to place is by air or sea.  We learned about the Inuit culture from a Greenlandic family on the ship (the woman being an ex-Prime-Minister and a current Danish Parliament member).  If Iceland is fire, Greenland is ice.  We saw glaciers and icebergs.  The fjords are grand, the mountains big and imposing and the tiny tundra plants very beautiful.  I was overcome with the contrast of the big views and the wonder of the plants, gorgeous in their autumnal color.  Imagine an orange leafed birch tree or a blueberry bush complete with blueberries both just 1 inch high.  We saw whales and seals but no seabirds.  Any bird worth it's feathers had migrated months ago.  After the tour ended, our oldest son joined us and we spent 4 more days in Reykjavik.  Being put off by the high cost of restaurants (an average main dish costs at least $50 US), we "ate in", enjoying fish and chips and salad.  It was a wonderful trip and my visual memory bank is full up with images of the amazing nature we saw.  The trip was a real success enhanced by having good weather and good health the whole time.

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Observations on chickens

Many months ago, Sonja, then eight, got it in her head that she wanted to have some chickens.  She researched raising chickens, gave us a very sophisticated presentation promoting her idea.  It gestated for many months and by the spring, it was decided, Sonja would get her chickens.  When we were here in March, Bob built a beautiful chicken coop and the chicks they'd bought, by then adolescent, were moved into it.  It's the chicken Hilton.  A cute barn red coop up on stilts with a ramp leading into it.  It's been five months and the hens have been laying eggs for 3 months.  Sonja has learned lessons: about loss, one of the most beautiful chickens (named Sunshine) was eaten by a neighbor's dog and responsibility.   We all think fresh eggs really do taste better.  It gives her great pleasure to share the eggs with neighbors.   I've been watching the chickens closely since we've been here and come up with some observations.  Common sayings- pecking order, hen-pecked, chicken scratching- have their origin in chicken behavior.  It's clear her six chickens know who's in charge.  Speckles is boss.  She's the biggest and most beautiful and powerful chicken.   She  comes out of the coop first every morning, gets to eat first, pecks any chicken that gets in her way.  Speckles is also the escape artist who finds every small crack in the fencing to get at the greener grass outside their run.  Yesterday Speckles got it into her chicken brain that she wanted to lay her egg under the Hosta plants in our yard and she escaped at least three times until she finally was out long enough to lay her egg there.  Can chickens plan ahead?  I think maybe, Sonja says no way.  The chickens do eat almost everything in their domain until it's striped of all vegetation.  They've cleared a thick patch of periwinkle out under the bushes between our houses and before that they cleared a large patch of grass in our yard which now reseeded is growing back vigorously having been fertilized generously with chicken manure.  I find the gentle clucking sounds they make very restful.  It's very pleasant just to sit in the shade of the trees, zone out and watch the chickens do their chicken thing.   I hope Sonja's interest in the chickens and her sense of responsibility for the chickens remains high.

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Seeing Sonia Sotomayor

Each year when the freshmen move into campus, the town of E. Lansing has a program called "One Book, One Community."  A book is chosen for all the freshmen (and other members of MSU community) to read and for the townies to read and then the author is invited to come and talk to the students and the townies. It's the 17th year of this program and this year Sonia Sotomayor is the author and her autobiography "My Beloved World" is the book.  I'd read the book and the family was interested in seeing the Associate Chief Justice in person.  So we all walked up to the High School an hour ahead of when they let people in and waited in line.  It was a hot humid afternoon, but luckily we had a place to wait in line in shade.  Once we got in and got good seats, only five rows from the front, it was comfortable waiting for the second hour.  Sonja and Erika shared Paul's IPhone playing games.  Paula graded papers and Paul and I relaxed and just waited.  It was worth the wait!  Justice Sotomayor got a standing ovation from the crowd when she came out.  She definitely came across as very human and humble.  She spoke about writing her book, why she wrote it (to remember where she came from) and how she wrote it (giving us advice about getting stories from our older relatives: when asking them about their lives asking why and how they felt about the story they tell).  She didn't sit up on the stage to answer the questions, but rather walked around the auditorium, shaking people's hands, getting hugs from the children, as she answered the questions.  Talk about working your audience!  Both Paul and Paula found her wise and very engaging.  I was very impressed especially with her closing advice about how to be happy:  every day make sure you learn something and that you do something kind.  I was enthralled with her humanity and to hear such an important person reflect on her life and work in the Supreme Court.  What a treat to hear her here in little old E. Lansing where good things happen.

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Simple Pleasures

It's Saturday morning and I'm just back from a visit to the local Farmer's Market.  Younger granddaughter, Sonja, went with me.  She had $5 is buy herself a special treat for breakfast.  Ever the careful shopper (when it's her money), she looked at everything.  Finally she consulted me about what fruit to buy - blueberries or raspberries.  She chose the raspberries and in the car, she said "These raspberries are a song in my heart!"  I am impressed when given freedom to buy anything, she chose healthy fruit.  The girls are a delight in every way.  Sonja is still her exuberant self, enthusiastic about whatever she's doing.  The chickens are flourishing, giving her 4 eggs a day.  She delights in giving them away to friends and neighbors and us. Erika is quieter, often seeking alone time for her reading but still amazing sweet and thoughtful.  She was very surprised I beat her at Connect Four.  At camp, she made me some beautiful beaded earrings.  After 4 days here, we've slipped easily back into our Michigan life.  I've made a point to do some of my favorite things: getting a haircut, working out with my favorite trainer (who, although she is expecting a baby any day now, is still working), going to the library, getting a fabulous massage, eat local peaches and tomatoes.  Dinners together are so much fun.  Last night, Paula made homemade roasted tomato soup with homegrown tomatoes from our yard, Brussel sprouts with bacon with homegrown Brussel sprouts from our yard and barbequed shrimp.  Yum.  Then we all went out for a long walk around E. Lansing in the fading evening light.  Simple pleasures and family time are the best.

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Redwoods Monastery

For 22 years, I've been going to Redwoods Monastery on retreats.   It's hard to believe it's been so long.  Even though  I haven't been for the last 3 or 4 years mostly because of my fears of my eyes burning and making long distance driving most difficult, I feel very connected to this place and these people.  This year, well, I just went and had no troubles.  Returning to the Monastery felt like a homecoming.  I was greeted by name and felt so happy to be remembered.  I slipped right back into the routine.   Being with the sisters in their liturgies is like stepping into a river, a river of living water that just flows on as I step in for the time I'm there.  This time all the participants without talking to each other decided our time at meals and beyond would be in silence.  I find it's so easy love people , to feel kindly to those on retreat when we're in silence.  No mean words, no words misunderstood, just presence.  After 3 days, I was really relaxed and peaceful.  It's like I have a spiritual charge given by the sisters, by the liturgies, by their angelic singing, by all of our singing antiphonally, by being in the beautiful redwoods and by separating myself from problems and concerns I have here at home.  All is well in the world and I am so happy to have been on retreat for 4 days with the wonderful warm hearted sisters at Redwoods Monastery.

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An Owl Calling

I hear an owl outside tonight.  It's in the woods in Tilden Park not far from our house.  Last week, we walked the block up to the local path to have a look around because there's been great activity up there.  The nearby meadow is filled with heavy machinery, a giant chipper, a huge grabber, big trucks:  they are cutting down a small forest near here.  Big trees have been felled probably to reduce the fuel load just in case of another fire.  There was a fire last October just over the hill.  If the winds hadn't died down, no doubt our houses, as well as the forest would have been burned down.  But now the ugly destruction of the forest looks like a battle field and made me sad.  As we walked the path, I spotted a great horned owl sitting on a high branch of a remaining pine tree.  It was calling, like it is doing now.  I wonder if it is grieving the loss of trees.  When I think about all the hundreds of thousands of trees that are being destroyed in the fires burning now in California, I too am grieving.  A tree is a wonderful living thing, creating its own environment, its own shade, and it provides a place of life for countless organisms.  I understand the need to make our neighborhood safe, but like the owl, I am sad for the loss of trees near here and beyond.

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Smoked Salmon on Toast

Yesterday I went out for brunch with a friend.  She suggested we go to Lalime's, a restaurant I've always liked here in Berkeley.  Well, I'm not a "foodie" and rarely do I get excited about food, but my meal was totally spectacular.  I find myself thinking about it, reliving the tastes and the color of it.  I had Smoked Salmon on Toast.  It sounded so pedestrian, I almost didn't order it, but something caught my eye and I kept coming back to it.  When it came, the server at first put it in front of my friend and I thought, "Wow, I wish I ordered that" and then low and behold, it was my Smoked Salmon on Toast.  But so much more than that---it was a feast for my eyes, bright rainbow of colors topped with a sprinkle of coarse bright red paprika.  Greens of many shades, red tomatoes and radishes, pink salmon, yellow tomatoes, white cheese and egg, orange tomatoes and runny egg yolk.  I got pleasure just looking at it.  But then I tasted it!  Every bite was different.  The greens were so varied: fresh mint leaves, dill, basil, Italian parsley, radicchio, arugula, they added a different taste of spice to each bite.  The ample serving of salmon, perfectly lightly smoked, was draped over the thick piece of white toast, a poached egg was on top, a dollop of ricotta cheese was next to the egg and both were covered with a delicious mild red bell pepper sauce.  There were cut radishes, cucumbers, halved pearl tomatoes of many colors arranged on the side and then it was surrounded with a halo of greens.  All my senses were astounded and delighted as I relished each and every bite.  What a marvelous experience!  And it only cost $12.  Maybe I could become a foodie, after all these years in Berkeley.

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Crickets

The grandchildren are gone after our week together.  I am filled with echoes and sweet memories of our time together.  I want to remember all the good times: the special smiles, the hugs, the ah-ha moments of discovery we had about each other.  Erik left this evening and now it is so very quiet here.  The quiet is so deep and strong, it feels loud.  As I sit here alone in the fading evening light, I hear the evening crickets and I'm glad that I am quiet and can hear them singing and remember all that has happened.

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Gramma and Grandpa Camp

It's Day Four of "Gramma and Grandpa Camp", the week we're taking care of our Palo Alto grandchildren for a week.  The larger family (the parents) thought it was a bit much for us and recruited Uncle Erik (the kids favorite uncle) to fly in for a week from the UK.  And bless his heart, he came.  They bought a HUGE Lego set "Big Ben" with over 5000 pieces to occupy them all.  Big Ben is now in the final stages of completion but there is also a huge imaginative free style train downstairs.  I've played innumerable games of Connect Four.  The eight year old beat me until she explained her strategy to me and now she wins no matter what.  If I win, it's because she is such a good teacher and if she wins, she wins.  We've been to the Oakland Zoo, the Lawrence Hall of Science, the UC and Tilden Botanical Gardens, and the Steam Train.  I've enjoyed getting to know the children better and find the little joys very rewarding.  Joys like seeing how they love nature and have great patience watching lizards, newts, birds and snakes, hearing the 8 year old singing to herself in the bedroom, seeing their creativity expressed in different ways.  Meals have been fun, all of us sitting at the big table.  The "camp" and all the meals has me really tried out by evening but it's definitely been fun.

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Star Wars at the Symphony

One of the things that I find hardest about getting older is that institutions I love aren't supported by younger folks.  For example, looking out at the Symphony on Saturday nights or church on Sunday morning, I see lots and lots of white hairs.  The extensive use of electronic devices has me worried about the future of print media I love--newspapers and magazines.  With email and texting, no one writes letters anymore and I worry about my mail deliveries.  How long will the Post Office keep delivering the trashy advertisements and requests for money?  Things are changing and changing so fast it's hard to keep up.  But last night I saw the result of the San Francisco Symphony fighting back.  We attended a movie night: a performance of the Symphony playing the score accompanying Star Wars V, The Empire Strikes Back shown on a huge big screen over the orchestra.  It was a decidedly younger crowd.  The woman next to me, probably in her 40's, said they come to all the movies.  The Hall was packed and the energy was high.  Everyone cheered and clapped in response to the orchestra and the movie.  There were even a few people dressed up as characters (X-Wing pilots in orange jump suits and a Princess Leia all in white with braids wrapped around her head).  They posed for pictures.  I thought "Good for the Symphony, finding something that people love and going after the younger crowd."  Maybe all isn't lost and all changes aren't bad.

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