Dad's doughnuts

On the way back from our Thanksgiving, we've stopped at nephew Ryan's beach house on Balboa Island.  I was fortunate to spend every summer while I was growing up here and the smell of the salty sea air, the cool breezes off Newport Bay, the golden evening light on the white houses on the hills and on the lone paddle  boarder as we walk around the Island takes me back to my childhood.  (I had a paddle board back in ancient days of my youth.)  One of the institutions still here from long ago is Dad's doughnuts.  On this first Sunday of Advent, I wanted a doughnut for breakfast.  At Dad's,  I picked out a cake doughnut covered in red and green sprinkles and thought about communion because it is the first Sunday of Advent.  As I held the doughnut, I thought about the words and actions of institution - taking, giving thanks, breaking and sharing.  It is my belief that what makes communion so holy is the intention and prayers of the officiant and the attention and prayers of those receiving the blessing.  Doughnuts, as anything that might nourish us and sustain life with full intention and prayers of praise and thanksgiving, are holy and blessed.   The beautiful blessed hole, empty space in the middle, gives the doughnut more surface area for the crispy fat soaked sweet crust.  The blessed, broken and shared doughnut was warm and sweet, like doughnuts I ate as a child.  As I ate it, I remembered all that, opened my heart and felt that not only was my body nourished but also my spirit.  And I am grateful and thankful for long ago blessings still here and for deeper understanding the profound meaning found in simple and ordinary activities.

Being Grateful

I am all tangled up with gratitude this morning.  This morning early I started thinking about the Indians from the story of the first Thanksgiving.  I know the Pilgrims had lots to be thankful for, the harvest brought by the Indians that saved them from starvation. That's what we celebrate on Thanksgiving with our American tradition of feasting with turkey and cranberry sauce and pumpkin pie.  But what about the Indians?   Being grateful does not negate the need for justice in our relationships, but gives us instruction of how to approach them.
Gratitude is an attitude of mind that saves us from the selfishness and complaining habit we can so easily get into.  It kicks us out of the mindset of taking so much for granted.  It puts us in a positive  place shifting our energy from the negative to positive.  I do believe that in every situation we can be grateful, though not always for what is happening, then for our very lives.  We can come to a place of seeing that all we have is really a gift and being in that place is indeed a place that moves us to saying one of the most powerful prayers we can say:  thank you.   Today I am grateful for my life, my family and friends, especially for my sister who is hosting us and for all that supports and sustains me in such a comfortable life, for absolutely all that I have experienced----thank you, thank you, thank you.

Life Force

Last week it rained  in Berkeley.  I measured nearly 4 inches at my hilltop rain gauge.  The rain triggered what seemed like an immediate greening of the dirt in my garden and the nearby hills.  On my hands and knees peering at the sprouting seeds' green cotyledons, I think about the incredible force of life the seeds exhibit. Add water to the dry N. CA soil and the seeds spring to life, roots grow at a frantic pace to bring in more water and stabilize the baby plant while the stem shoots upward to the light.  Mostly the seeds are weeds, best adapted for powerful and fast growth at least in my garden.  I marvel at these seeds.  Nothing can stop this urgent growth once the rains have come.  It is a glimpse of the very force of life that pulses through us as well, one of the strongest forces on earth.  Yet so often life seems fragile to us.

The news from Ferguson, MO told of deeply planted seeds of distrust, rage, unfairness and violence that sprouted to life after the, Grand Jury's ruling was released.  Listening to the District Attorney summarizing the  report that did not indict policeman Darren Wilson for the killing of Michael Brown, I thought about the force of life and how complex the seeds that have been planted.  I felt such grief and sadness for a young life lost in such a forceful violent way.  One armed and afraid, the other unarmed and afraid and filled with rage, their lives crashed into each other and one died.  We have much work yet to do.

Longing

A couple of weeks ago, Bob and I went over to Abbott's Lagoon at Pt. Reyes National Seashore.  The weather report promised it to be a nice day, the last before a series of storms, we took advantage of being retired and took off on this Monday morning for a nice day at the coast.   As we passed through Inverness, fog closed in and shrouded the low hills.  It only grew thicker as we approached Abbott's Lagoon.  Walking along the path from the parking lot to the lagoon, the fog was to the ground and we could only see the path a few feet in front of us.  Everything was hushed and silent, hidden and mysterious.  Even the usual white crowned sparrows had gone somewhere else.  I felt from the earth a tremendous longing, a longing for rain to end the long long drought.  And I realized there is also a tremendous longing in me but for what I'm not exactly sure.  My life has become very quiet.  There isn't the pressure and busyness that plagues our culture.  I have time.  I have space.  I am waiting.  

Preface to Holey Doughnut

It's December, 2018 as I write this post, which I've post-dated to appear at the beginning of my blog.

I began writing this blog as a way to express how I felt about what was happening in my life and in the world. I didn’t know I’d keep it up for years. It has become a record of sorts. I could never have imagined when I began this blog that our country and the world could change so much as it has in the past two years. I don’t know what is going to happen. I could have never imagined the Natural World would be under such threat as it is from Global Warming, pollution and species extinction. I mourn the loss of little songbirds, butterflies, nudibranchs, polar bears and many many other species. I mourn the terrible wildfires in the Western U.S. I rejoice our family is thriving. I am walking through this life of ours with my dear husband Bob. We enjoy good health and keep busy and happy. The children all have good jobs and are settled in their lives. The grandchildren are healthy and happy and growing up in loving homes. They all attend very good public schools. We are greatly blessed and most days when I think about my life, I am truly grateful. This blog is for them.

Photo: August 2018 in New Era, Michigan