Birthday Boys

 Yesterday was Bob’s birthday.  I don’t need to say how old he is because what is important is that for this coming week he is two years older than me.  He didn’t seem much changed.  He seemed to enjoy his day very much.  Erik has come to be with us for our birthdays, so it was special to have Erik sitting at the breakfast table with us.  We had bagels and soft boiled eggs and nobody complained.  During breakfast on his own IPhone Liam called Bob and sang him “Happy Birthday.”  Bob was very pleased to talk with Liam and Arne and Karna.  Erik and Bob spent the morning in his “Happy Place,” his shop, working on fixing the big washing machine drum and spider Erik brought out with him.  At lunch, they enjoyed pickled herring. Naps filled much of the afternoon, with Bob being the only one awake.  

Then for dinner, our long-time friends, Nancy and Larry came over.  Nancy’s son Robby also came.  He and his wife Alyson moved out to the Bay Area a couple of years ago and it was a treat to see him again.  He and Erik and Paul were good friends growing up.  Rob seemed much happier than I’ve seen him in years and that made me happy.  HIs birthday was just a couple of days ago, so we celebrated him too.  The dinner turned out well with barbecued teriyaki salmon, tomato risotto and broccoli and salad.  Bob is our barbecue guy now.  After dinner, we had a cake and presents.  Everyone was very happy.  

Day by Day

 My days have been busy these last weeks.  I am keenly aware that I am coming to the end of my official ministry on July 2.  It was been a blessing in so many ways.  I have learned much and for that I am grateful.  Probably the most important thing I learned is that I am enough.  I already knew I wasn’t perfect, but I’ve always tried so hard at everything I do perhaps trying to appear perfect. With the clarity and assurance that I am enough, I seem to have relaxed into my work as minister.  Sometimes I feel I’m not doing enough, but Barry (my co-pastor) assures me that I’m doing plenty.  Much of what I do is so natural to me that it doesn’t even seem like work.  What I had forgotten about being a minister is the responsibility one bears for caring for the church, all its people and staff and all the many details that seem to take up so much time and energy.  I look forward to laying my stole on the altar next week, symbolically ending my ministry. 

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In the meantime, life goes on in many other ways too.  Last night we hosted Bob’s Yale roommates and their wives, in honor of one being up here for SoCal.  It was a lovely evening.  All the food turned out great and the conversation never waned.  I thought at one point, Egads, we are all getting decrepit.  Well some more than others.  No names here.  I heard more than one organ recital (what one old parishioner called the old people’s tendency to recite all their recent health issues).  

We had another visit from Liam, Arne and Boba.  Arne had washed Boba and gotten a shirt for Boba to wear so he wouldn’t shed all over our house.  I was touched how Arne wanted for Boba to be a blessing and not a worry, but I worried that Arne worried too much.  Perhaps we all worry too much.  I do have a vacuum.  

We learned last week that a dream trip the Chile Mujeres planned for winter of 2019 is really going to happen in December 2023.  We women bonded on a birding trip ten years  to Chile.  And we have been getting together each year since to visit a Botanical Garden and have lunch. Now we are going to Uruguay together.  Who do you know who’s been to Uruguay?  I’m happy and excited it is going to happen.    

Watching from afar, I enjoy hearing about all the many activities of our children and grandchildren.  

Encanto

 Today was a great day at the Botanical Garden.  My co-volunteer Kathy and I efficiently handled the end of our pop-up sale.  We distributed to the plant deck half the plants and flatted up the rest to be moved tomorrow up to our section.  It was a good sale, we sold lots of plants.  So as we finished, I suggested with the rest of our morning, we take a stroll in the Garden.  That is one of my favorite things to do, reminding me of the beauty all the Garden has and why I love the Garden so much.  We headed up to see the puyas.  When Lew Feldman, the Garden’s Director, heard us say we were going to the puyas, he told us to be sure to stick our fingers in the flowers and taste the liquid there.  So we headed up to where the puyas were.  But first we encountered the Old Rose Garden.  It surprised us.  It was in full bloom and absolutely beautiful.  At one point, we saw a mom and her 5 year old daughter who said, as she walked under the rose covered arch, “This is just like Encanto (the Disney movie).  She was right, the Garden is enchanted.  We were also awed and took numerous photos in our trusty IPhones.  We turned down the path to the puyas, plants that must be related to pineapples with their prickly spears of leaves.  The pumas have incredibly colored flowers—turquoise blue or intense yellow or dark black.   We stuck our fingers in the puddle of liquid in ate flowers.  It was so sweet!  Puyas are a big draw to the Botanical Garden.  Walking back through the Mexico section, we appreciated the many flowering Salvias.  It was delight to take our stroll. One  of the reasons I love the Garden is that it is different each time and always beautiful.  It is good to remember that and take a stroll from time to time. 

A Nice Saturday

 It’s really nice to have Bob back at home.  This morning in the dense pea-soupy fog, I suggested we go out for a walk to get us going. . We’re wanting to go for a walk each day.  We got dressed and went out.  We were warmly dressed.  I had on my ski hat and a thick coat.  Walking though warmed us up and the day seemed to brighten up as we walked. We both ended up carrying our coats.  All in all, we walked 3.3 miles which was enough.  I found a beautiful poppy along the way, just across from Bob’s friend’s house, which pleased me to photograph..  

This afternoon we attended a Berkeley Community Chorus Concert at Hertz Hall on the UC Berkeley campus.  They were performing Mendelssohn’s Oratorio “Elijah”.  The chorus, 140 members strong, filled the stage and was amazing.  The orchestra was outstanding.  With the four excellent soloists, the performance was up to a professional performance standard.  I think it’s amazing to live in a town where the level of the volunteers is so high.  I especially loved the parts at the end of each half where all the stops were pulled out:  the chorus was booming, the soloists were all singing, the orchestra was playing with all the brass and the timpani and the organ came in with my favorite a deep bass continuo.  It was fantastic.  It is great to live in a town where such things happen and are free.

Another Day with Liam

 Liam is out of school now and didn’t have any camp or class to go to, so the family stepped in.  We got to have him spend the day with us yesterday.  Luckily Bob came home from Michigan Wednesday, so there were two of us.  In the morning, he took Liam over to church to inspect the new construction work.  When I got home at noon from the Botanical Garden, they were busy attending to the big remote control boat they’ve been building for months now.  Liam said he wasn’t ready for lunch yet.  Bob and Liam have a deep bond over building things and now Liam is especially interested in wood.  He did his 4th grade science project on which kind of wood glue is the strongest.  There is a rhythm to the days Liam spends with us.  First, he does things with Bob and then to take a break, he’ll come upstairs seeking me out and do something with me.  After lunch, I went to my loom where I’ve been weaving his long long strands of finger knitting into a mat.  He likes to stand and inspect what I do as I do it.  He makes suggestions, measures different things.  Yesterday he asked me how old the loom was.  I told him I got it in 1976 and asked him how old it was.  Very quickly he said, “47 years.”  He likes math and is good at it.  Then we played a game of Spite and Malice, a card game passed down through the generations from my mother who used to play it with our kids.  Liam has gotten very good at it and told me, laughing as he won the first game, “Gramma, you made three blunders and gave the game to me.”  Blunders, I like that word and indeed, my play had been sloppy.  Tired of that, he went down to the shop with Grandpa and later when I went to see what they were doing, he was sanding away with an electric sander, making all sorts of noise.  He was pretty happy to tell me what the funny the advertising slogan for the shop vac was (“Our vacuum really sucks.”). I went down to my garden which is in full bloom, a glorious profusion of many colors and began to attend it.  He came out and inspected the garden (he likes to inspect things) and asked me what the sweet peas were.  I told him and he wanted to find the pea pods, which he did and then proceeded to open them and eat them up.  Such a funny boy.  We ended the day by making cookies together.  A day with 10 year old Liam is a pleasure and blessing for both Bob and me.  

Being Kind

 One of my best friends, Sharona says every night before she goes to sleep, she asks herself “Have I been kind today?”  Then she reviews her day.  What a beautiful spiritual practice reflecting one of her deeply held values.  I also think kindness is very important.  I think about what the world would be like if everyone were kind to one another.  It is very important to me to be kind in my interactions with all people and with nature.  Sometimes this practice involves saying a kind word to a clerk or a thank to someone who holds the door for me.  Sometimes it involves smiling at a homeless person.  Sometimes it means I reach out to see how a friend or a family member is.  Is it being kind to water my garden, I wonder?  The person I’m not always kind to is myself.  What would it look like to be kind to myself, I wonder?  Would I buy organic produce?  Would I do things I know make me stronger and healthier?  In the last four months of paid ministry at Arlington Church, I don’t think I’ve always been kind to myself.  Ministry is such a sedentary and all consuming job, my fitness has just gone away as I have let my walks go by the wayside.  Is it selfish to do things just for me?  I somehow got that idea as a child and have most always put my own wants and needs last.  Being kind to myself is doing things that nurture my body, soul and spirit.  It’s time to pay attention and be kind to myself.